9

Most men know that sometimes a stream of pee can go in some unwanted direction, which can cause problems like dirty clothes or a dirty floor. Is there a way to prevent this from happening, or maybe a precaution to take?

  • 5
    Try sitting-down – Stan Sep 10 '17 at 22:52

11 Answers 11

24

Just sit down when you have to go!

  • 3
    It's not always feasible in jeans and at urinals – Aman Thakkar Jan 4 '16 at 5:43
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    don't matter in a public urinal, they're always manky anyway, but in a home, sit down, its the only way to be sure. – Bamboo Jan 4 '16 at 13:34
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    What, you've never sat in a urinal? ;) – Broots Waymb Jan 5 '16 at 22:50
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    If your jeans are too tight to sit down in, you've bought the wrong jeans. – Hobbes Mar 15 '18 at 16:48
13

The longer it is the more accurate it will be. enter image description here

  • 1
    This solution really isn't a solution. It's funny (which I know was your intention), but completely impractical in nearly every situation. Not to mention the fact that you'd have to keep the damned thing clean. – goodguy5 Sep 26 '17 at 14:51
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    @goodguy5 It would stay clean if the inside of the tube is coated with a hydrophobic material. But that's probably completely impractical too! – BrettFromLA Mar 8 '18 at 18:44
6

An alternative to sitting is to kneel in front of the toilet, if you are tall enough. If your thigh bones are too short, the lip of the toilet bowl will be higher than you need it to be. (I'm 5' 10" and it works for me.)

enter image description here

  • I like this, but what about public restrooms? – Just Do It Jan 5 '16 at 17:51
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    This won't work any place that OTHER men have missed and splattered. You'd probably need to sit. – BrettFromLA Jan 5 '16 at 18:25
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    Why would anybody do this instead of just sitting – Buns Glazing Jan 12 '16 at 19:23
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    @GnomeSlice Why would anybody sit instead of just kneeling? – BrettFromLA Jan 12 '16 at 20:13
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    Kneel before the sacred throne! – papakias Mar 12 '18 at 15:46
5

If you're uncircumcised, make sure to pull your foreskin back. Doing so can improve your aim dramatically and should get you on target!

  • this is the correct answer in my humble opinion. I can safely say that I have never urinated on the floor when using this technique. – bigbadmouse Mar 12 '18 at 16:22
4

okay, first off here... there is no way to prevent "splatter" other than sitting, however, by using a little muscle control and some simple hand manipulation the "splatter" may be severely reduced and overall aim improved. While not the best advice for "High Pressure Streams" this seems to work best for "low or intermitted" streams. First pinch shaft/urethra off and relax or lightly push using bladder muscles. Second once PRIMED system is achieved, simply release pinch point while simultaneously pushing like normal. Third once stream pressure has decreased to unsatisfactory level, pinch and repeat the process repeatedly.

NOTE: I find it best to use sphincter muscle flex to stop stream before "bare minimum" pressure is achieved, as this helps prime the pump so to speak for the next pulse. Otherwise you may be at the can for quite a while.

  • Since this is the Lifehacks Stackexchange community, other members are always going to come up with out-of-the-box solutions. I recommend avoiding phrases like "there is no way other than _____" ! :) – BrettFromLA Jan 4 '16 at 22:45
  • This is a good one! – Aman Thakkar Jan 5 '16 at 2:41
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    also since its skin, the urinal orifice is prone to "stick" together you can just give a gentle stretch, this works for me – Just Do It Jan 5 '16 at 17:50
  • Exactly. All these sissy boys downvoting my advice. Make the organ work properly ... pay attention to its condition and your aim. Basic man stuff. – Kevin_Kinsey Feb 5 '16 at 21:14
4

Specifically regarding the "splitstream" issue:

Sometimes a part of the opening to your urethra will be stuck to another part (for me, it's often after sex). If you have the state of mind to think about it, you can gently pull apart the opening to your urethra, to make sure that it is unobstructed. Then release your penis and pee as you normally would.

This solution is sometimes related to the 45 degree off-shoot issue, but not always.

2

Basically sitting down is the only safe option, but if some weird circumstance dictates that you can't do that you could utilize a cup or a bottle to pee into and/or redirect your stream. The target area would then be closer, and you reduce the risk of spillage.

This will however fail if you have "high pressure" pee stream... Then your other option is simply to get closer to the target somehow. Using a stall you could bend down towards the toilet bowl, and for a urinal get as close as possible. Do be advised that you might get splashing if the angles are incorrect.

So in short, do sit down if uncertain and it's possible. If not, you're at risk of spillage, but can reduce the risk a little by getting closer to your target or utilize a catcher of some sort.

  • no man without a medical problem should need to sit down to avoid this, @vanessadelafuentecaro has the right idea. – bigbadmouse Mar 13 '18 at 8:41
2

I ALWAYS sit down on normal toilets, it's best to give the toilet seat a clean with toilet paper (nothing beats sitting down in someone else's pee ..).

The odd chance I need to pee in a urinal, I pull back the skin on my you know what to make sure that doesn't get in the way. I also make a banana shape bend, so I'm really close to the urinal.

1

For a standard man and a standard toilet, it is hardly impossible to urinate "cleanly" 99.5% of the time.

Take enough to time make sure your penis is unencumbered (stretched out straight, not fouled by clothing, hairs, etc.)

Then practice until you can shoot straight. Aim with your hand, as if using a water hose.

Aim for the water in the toilet. If necessary, as the stream pressure changes, move your hips (and therefore your penis) closer to the target, in a straight line.

Basic boy lessons from childhood ;-)

  • 8
    where do you get this 99.5% "statistic" from? – Just Do It Feb 4 '16 at 19:24
  • Well I've been practicing for 18 years but I still go wrong – Aman Thakkar Feb 5 '16 at 17:57
  • I videoed myself p*ssing 1000 times and counted the results. :P – Kevin_Kinsey Feb 5 '16 at 21:15
  • So I take it you've never had the experience of making sure you are uncumbered then aiming straight forward only to experience this annoyance of two separate streams coming out in opposite directions, neither straight ahead? I might add that as you age this affects structural changes, so the lessons you learned in childhood aren't necessarily valid for your whole life. – Michael Feb 23 '16 at 18:53
  • Issues for those with tiny urethras? ;-) – Kevin_Kinsey Feb 24 '16 at 18:12
1

I've seen this before and did some research on it. It seems as though there is a place in a urinal that tends to produce less splatter, and they those little insert are put on that spot. I couldn't find the article that mentioned that, but I have found that if I see one of those and hit it, the splatter is reduced. Also its good aim practice!

  • Welcome to Lifehacks! Whilst this may theoretically answer the question, it would be preferable to include the essential parts of the answer here, and provide the link for reference. – LаngLаngС Mar 15 '18 at 19:53
0

Your urinary tract is what creates the stream and any obstruction in it can cause splatter or the stream to go off-target. This can include dried semen from sex/masturbation and infection/inflammation.

Cranberries can help with this. Washing thoroughly after sex/masturbation can also help.

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