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The title really says it all, but for you sticklers...

How to eat chips with out getting hands dirty?

Things I have tried:

  • A napkin; very awkward

  • Not eating chips; not a solution

  • Eating with my pinky and ring finger only; even more awkward

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  • 7
    chopsticks? jk :D
    – J. Musser
    Dec 14, 2014 at 4:22
  • 2
    @J.Musser Nah how about a fork
    – hLk
    Dec 14, 2014 at 4:24
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    I'm assuming your eating out of a large bag? If it's just a small bag, just open it, and eat it like a drink. With your mouth covering the bottom of the opening, and lift the bag up in the air so that gravity will push the chips downward towards your mouth.
    – CRABOLO
    Dec 14, 2014 at 4:29
  • @Sompuperoo Those are good ideas, but they are simply avoiding the issue rather than solving it. Also, drinking chips is really awkward as well.
    – hLk
    Dec 14, 2014 at 4:39
  • 3
    1) Empty the chips into a large clear plastic bag. 2) Secure bag to head using a rubber band running from the base of the rear of the skull to just under the lower lip. 3) Using an air compressor or hand pump, inflate the bag. 4) Chips should now be at the level of your mouth. Tilt your head forward slightly if necessary. Bon appetit! 5) For extra added fun, use an opaque black plastic bag, then go out for a walk. WARNING! MAY CAUSE SUFFOCATION, HEAT STROKE, HAY FEVER, ASTHMA, DROPSY, SCURVY, PLEURISY, AND MOSQUITO BITES! USE AT YOUR OWN DISCRETION!!!!!! Aug 13, 2015 at 15:09

2 Answers 2

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Things you may use:

  • Roll the sides of the bag down or put the chips on a platter so that you do not have to touch the greasy bag.

  • Use a tissue to touch chips.

  • If you are eating with several people put your chips in a cup and bring it to you mouth and eat that way.

  • Use a fork. Take the forked end and carefully stick a chip between the forks and then eat it like that.


Additional Info

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Use Chopsticks.

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  • 5
    I like this chopsticks idea. I shall have to try it.
    – Justin
    Dec 14, 2014 at 5:31
  • Oh, so I should get chips and do it. First I'd need to buy chips. I've been avoiding them to avoid getting fat during finals week. Honestly, I haven't seen anyone grab chips with their tongues except me. Hey, maybe you could do it for me and supply pics.
    – Justin
    Dec 14, 2014 at 5:34
  • @Quincunx Its a common method, try the internet, But I may be able to help. And the bowl idea seems nasty, I think use a cup, because other people might be using the bowl.
    – Pobrecita
    Dec 14, 2014 at 5:39
  • Really, bowls are nasty? Are you imagining a communal bowl? That's terrible. I'm talking about a personal bowl. I like bowls more than cups because it's easier to reach the bottom.
    – Justin
    Dec 14, 2014 at 5:41
  • Yeah, most people would think so. I wouldn't find it gross, but most of my family would. So I guess I just have to do that alone...
    – Justin
    Dec 14, 2014 at 5:46
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Assuming you don't mind getting your thumb and forefinger dirty, you could do push the bottom of the chip bag up so that you can reach the chips without submerging your hand in the bag, which would get your knuckles all dirty. For detailed instructions, I like this video by Crazy Russian Hacker

However, if you don't want to get your hands dirty at all, there is only one way I've found. It doesn't work with all kinds of chips, just the ones that stick to your tongue or that you can grasp with your tongue:

  1. Pour some amount of chips into a bowl. This can be done without touching the chips at all.
  2. Hold the bowl with one hand
  3. Move the bowl upwards towards your mouth
  4. Stick your tongue out towards the chips, letting it touch one
  5. If the chip sticks to your tongue, great. Cheetos do that well. So does popcorn. If the chip doesn't stick to your tongue, attempt to grasp the chip with your tongue (probably requires a flexible tongue)
  6. Pull your tongue back into your mouth.

The chip should now be in your mouth and you can eat properly.

Note: when there are few chips left in your bowl, it starts to get awkward because you have to bury your face in the bowl and stick your tongue out really far. But hey, if we want clean hands...

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