I am not underweight, but I am tall and skinny. I have basically zero fat on my shoulder, and so my clavicle and acromion poke through, making a very uncomfortable resting place for a head.

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My best solution so far would be to carry a little shoulder pad around in my pocket, and nonchalantly slip it under my shirt whenever necessary, but that seems a little tacky.

Is there a certain way I can hold my arm to minimize discomfort for the rester?

Perhaps I can exercise or eat in a certain way to build fat/muscle on my shoulder?

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    Don't worry about it, if someone likes you enough to rest their head on your shoulder then you're already perfect :) Jul 3, 2015 at 18:50

3 Answers 3


In most scenarios when someone rests their head on your shoulder its a sign of his/her affections towards you. In such situations how boney your shoulder is will not be an issue for that person. Nobody's shoulder is really comfortable to lean on but the person who is leaning their head will subconsciously adjust to compensate. Carrying something specifically for that purpose could seem too keen and could be off putting.


Why pretend to be nonchalant - just be actually confident and casual about it instead. If someone wants to lay their head on your shoulder, tell 'em its boney and uncomfortable and that you'll fold your coat or jumper or whatever and pad it with that for them, because you're very happy for them to use your shoulder but it might be uncomfortable for them, or use a cushion if you're somewhere there's one lying about.

Unfortunately, there is no optimum position you can adopt to reduce or cushion the bones - wherever you put your arm, those bones at the top will still be there.


I was thinking, I have the same problem as you, but I'm building on my trapezius and deltoid muscle around there just to cushion it up a little so that it would be much more comfortable because the gap between them is where the bone protrudes the most. Not building my muscle too much, but just enough to cushion it up

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